beautiful horrors

i wake to a blushing sky
a burnt orange sky
heavy and too soft, too close
lovely and thick with particles
of trees and houses
ashes
of strangers who loved rolling hills
barrels of grape becoming wine
watching cows graze, waiting on sunsets
building family in a bit of space
who didn’t or couldn’t leave
when the fire arrived, hungry and indiscriminate

we live in an age of beautiful horrors
horrible beauties
whatever – the golden age of global warming
it’s a balmy apocalypse
gorgeous bare days in what should be fall
the leaves turn slowly, confused
storms spiral in waves across the sea
roar around eyes deep black
in the solid swirl of winds that
lift roofs and split walls

i want to surrender to the greater wisdom here
to the great cleansing
to the flames and the salt,
to the water that piles down from the sky
to know that it’s the next change,
what is
and what will be
but how can i swallow this bitter sense
that the hurt lands on those already hurting
but how can i trust this beautiful face
with its charred breath
its calm eyes in the heart of epic death
but how can i trust this chaos
shape it to move with us towards freedom
but how can i take a step forward
without that trust?

this is the way i wake up
don my mask for the day
walk into the end times
to find my beloveds
to go forward into the unknown
again
together

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