sabbatical boundaries

beloveds – i have had a number of somewhat panicked messages since monday that made me think it might be helpful to articulate how to interact with me on my sabbatical.

first, a couple of FAQ type things:

what is a sabbatical?
“a period of paid leave granted to a university teacher or other worker for study or travel, traditionally one year for every seven years worked.”

why am i taking one as a non-academic?
i identify in the ‘other worker’ category, on good days an organic intellectual. in the last seven years i have completed three books for publishing and three books that are still making their way to the light, toured a lot of places, been a doula for an institute, facilitated and mediated movements i admire, and survived mad shit.

what am i going to do?
i am going to travel and rest, rest, rest until i remember how to really sleep and feel a good deep breath. i may study pace and creating in the realm of fiction, music and art.

and how can y’all interact with me on this journey? here goes:

send me beautiful, weird, cool, science/fictional, Black, liberation or other awesome things – i especially love pictures of bombastic creatures, proof of magic, and high quality memes.

send me positive vibes that remind me how each of us are more miraculous and valuable than anything we have or could ever produce.

if you happen to see me in the wild, know that i am aiming for anonymity. be kind, and let me go on.

i am aiming for unstructured and unplanned space. if you are not my family or woes, please do not ask me where i am going, or if you can join me.

do ask me how my heart is, what is interesting my mind these days, what inspires me.

don’t take it personally if i answer internally.

do not ask me to work.

beyond facilitation and writing, my work includes scheduling, brain picking, assessing, connecting, interviews, administration, and teaching. do not ask.

that includes not asking me who to reach out to in my absence about work – my auto responder and all social media have the email addresses to use for all work related requests: or – ask them…and please honor their answers.

especially don’t slide into my DMs/private messages to ask me to work, or to slip around my boundaries.

holding boundaries as people push against them is work. do not push against my boundaries. do not ask me to collaborate with you in breaking my boundaries.

if you aren’t sure if what you want to say or share is work or not, wait until June 2020 to say or share it. let’s share the interdependent faith that it’ll keep or find another space.

and finally, recognize how hard it is to need this, to write this, to ask for this, to take this moment for myself, to go into the unknown of myself. hold my hand by holding my boundaries.

with love!

ps. you can also give to my sabbatical fund:

you can send me money (thru apps below or send checks c/o allied media projects with amb sabbatical fund in memo line) OR e-gift certificates to online places where I can order books!

cash app: $adriennemareedough
venmo: adrienne-brown-25

cold moon conjure

we. out. here.

releasing the walls that held/hold in harm and danger.

releasing regressive constructs that are scared of change.

releasing any small particles of tolerance for abusers – learning from the biodynamic and interconnected youth who just say the truth and ask us to live in it, demand us to change it.

releasing any idea that shrinking ourselves is what makes room for others…learning to trust in the abundant world which needs all of us, all of our gifts.

releasing what has died this past decade – loved ones, loveships, illusions. thank you for the lessons, for being a part of everything we are and will be.

releasing expectations of and attention on those who are not trying to grow right now. it’s all good, really it is, pace is subjective. but i hear tomorrow calling and i am in love with that sound.

releasing the small ways obligation has crept into my heart. letting love and liberation cleanse me back my authentic, odd and positively obsessed self.

releasing those i can’t forgive, and those who can’t forgive me. may we be happy. accountable, rebirthed, yes. but happy.

releasing what i cannot carry, cannot swallow, cannot believe, cannot feel, and cannot trust.

releasing the sharp and isolating teeth of superiority that sit inside of recognition like a venus fly trap – i know better: i’m not better.

releasing regret, and shaping change so that i can end patterns of regret. particularly releasing any patterns that keep me from letting feeling guide my actions. my intuition is becoming a pendulum in my cells, and i am learning to trust my direction, my tongue and my mistakes.

releasing any narrative that asks me to sacrifice my health for my relevance. i only want to mean something to those who care about my flesh, bones and spirit.

dark night, bright moon, prayers up, thank you


optimism and practice

it is hard work to believe in the apparently impossible enough to move towards it.

it is terrifying to see another way, especially if it is truly a transformation you see, especially if it begins within you. then it becomes daily practice, cultivating the seed of a transformed world within.

it is generating and sustaining the possibility of liberation, not just for each of us individually, but for a collective body, for a species…daily practice of that generating and sustaining in the tunnel of justified hopelessness, that is what gives us options, a future. neither violence nor victory within the current context is as dangerous to those holding unjust power as someone who knows: we are free and will continue to move and shape the world accordingly.

every day.