the thing i want to be best at is love…

Today I had several powerful conversations, interactions and realizations.

A friend reported back to me that a line I had tweeted, “the thing I want to be best at is love”, had become a foundational part of a memorial she gave for her grandmother a day later.

My grandmother* has been on my mind because a great-aunt just passed, my grandmother’s sister, another link to my mostly unknown lineage.

When my friend told me her story, we had a moment of remembrance and tears for our dead grandmothers, both of whom were best at love, who shaped us – with what they gave us in real life and the stories they sparked in others’ mouths after their lives. The gift of having a grandmother whose legacy is love, “this life story of being a lover”, is immeasurable.

Sometimes people cry with longing, sometimes with relief, sometimes with hormones. Sometimes they don’t know the difference.

Having love as a core ambition shifts what I consider success to look like. Instead of racing towards something in the future, I simple have to drop more deeply, with more awareness, into what I can offer now.

There is enough time for me to do all I want and need to do, I can stop wasting time on worry.

When we make leadership health and wholeness a more interdependent and mutually supportive experience, we are extending the lives and energy of our leader-workers, and thus the resilience of our community.

A friend’s dream indicates that there is a body of new leaders out there who have not yet even begun to flex their transformative power.

Network building is simply another form of weaving.

Professional polyamory might be the way of the future. I am no longer convinced there is one penultimate calling, “the one” profession for life. It is becoming apparent that one life-long monogamous partner is not necessarily the only or healthiest or most common experience of love…maybe the same is true of work. There might not be just one calling or profession best suited to us any longer. If we stay present, we may find we have many gifts to be brought many places, only visible when it’s the right time.

While it is still hard to present my work to people these days, because I draw from such a non-linear toolbox, people are willing to hire me because of how focused I am on love.

A friend reminded me that in Ursula LeGuin’s The Dispossessed there is one word that means both work and play.

One of my longest held dreams, to be able to dedicate a portion of the year to just writing, is within reach.

It is most likely important to document our thoughts and our dreams right now, understanding that that which seems prophetic might be worth writing down.

* when i search my grandmother’s name, every article that comes up is about an amazing activist i worked with at ruckus. i was willing for us to do work with this activist on faith because i took the fact that the leader had my grandmother’s name as a sign. that was a major piece of the ruckus transformation…from which i can only conclude that my grandmother is with me, reminding me to love.

**reading Fractal Mode, Book 2 of The Mode Series

1 Response to “the thing i want to be best at is love…”


  1. 1 bailarconlavida

    WOW!!
    This post was too powerful for me not to jot some of the great insights/quotes in my journal.

    I have been following your blog for over a year and through your honesty and truth, I have learned to love/appreciate/ and laugh with myself more and more. Thank you, =)

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