getting un-numbified

ok ok ok

i was feeling a bit numb and overwhelmed by everything i had to do to make a good transition from ny to cali, league to ruckus, now to then. and then i heard ‘unspeakable joy’ by kim english and got my soul right!!

lol – well not exactly that, but download the osio club mix and dance around your room, thats like my theme song, cuz every time i get stuck, i have to go inside and pull it out, that joy thing. even my therapist has joy in her name!

a good teacher told me that a great master in any realm falls off balance as much as anyone else, but she is more expert at recentering herself, until from the outside you can’t even see a moment of wavering. for me its truth and reconciliation – the truth is i have a whole lot to do, and all of it is stuff i manifested and wanted. i can balance in that.

it also helps that the League has hired a communications director and he really really knows what the hell he is doing and is going to take what i was trying to do into the realm of the real and the fabulous, beyond what i could have even dreamed.

so now i can think about going to california!

what follows is all hella random:

is it wrong to say that sometimes when i walk around, particularly in chelsea, i kind of wish i was a hottie gay guy with a great ass in torn jeans with a mohawk? and that given the reality that the men i am closest to in life are gay, bi-, or remarkably metro, and i keep trying to cut my hair into at least a faux hawk, and my ass…well, hee hee…anyway, i hate the term fag hag, but i love the idea of being a fabulous queen. does this whole paragraph just gain me a perma-membership in the ignoramus-of-the-day club?

a blip of amb wisdom: i overheard a woman on a phone on 14th street saying, "i mean, yes he has been an asshole, but he says he’s going to change those things. give him a chance." i wanted to grab the phone from her, and tell her friend – he’ll never change. either love that shit in front of you or gets ta steppin {as oprah would say}. instead of that dramatic and potentially dangerous move, i made a note to self to yell that to myself if ever in another situation with a ‘fixer-upper’ – that really just means a mismatch, so moveon. AMEN.

also, its official, i hate interventions! i walked into one last night by accident and they just really aren’t my thing, unless its the last resort. in which case, it should be done at a resort over massages and margeritas! 

i am going to live in a yurt for june! it has a wood floor and a sunroof! i think i am heading into the extreme simplification phase of my life. i want a bed and my books and not too much more than that. those who have been to my house know this is a big shift!

trader joe’s in new york feels weird. but not weird enough to keep me from buying pecan praline granola, which is like the best in the world!

spring is great for layering. layering is my favorite way to dress. i noticed today that my style was looking like a 30 year old more than a 20 year old. i can only hope elegance triumphs over the frump to which i am drawn.

ok, two other blogs to do – i am the guest blogger for the drum major institute this week – www.dmiblog.net, as well as www.indyvoter.org. chale-ho!