Sigh. I’ve just wanted that as a post title, I swear my breath is minty and I only spit in dreams. As I am posting from the sidekick I will tell you when there’s a paragrah by saying…
This pensive season finds me of two minds at minimum. In one mind I am beside myself with joy at my new job. The Ruckus thing is cool as hell. Did you see our flash yet? Www.notyoursoldier.org/sns – that’s the kind of work we’re doing. Pg.
On the other hand, I need a vacation bigtime! I put my mom and sister on a plane to japan this morning…actually pause – I watched them go thru security, and it made me sad. It is really intrusive and demoralizing, stripping down so. I fly like every other day and I have never seen security find anything. Does anyone have stats on the impact of embarrassing security detail other than slowing one’s roll? Pg.
So I need a vacation and I had my heart set on a road trip but I can’t find any co-drivers and driving the whole way alone seems wasteful and expensive and hard and unromantic. Maybe I should go somewhere. Pg.
I wrote a song hook yesterday which is just awesome. Several friends have recently experienced what I call ‘the knee jerk I love you’ when push came to shove. Parents teach your kids to give and receive love, that’s your only freakin job! Pg.
So the real point is, songs are coming again, after a long time of nothing inspired. Good songs. At least, good choruses. I am so overdue for a season of song, but I think the synergy I am seeing everywhere is moving right into the part of me that processes life into song, the great observer. Being depressed and overly pensive is just a waste of time, too easy, not what we are here for. Not that I know exactly what we are here for, but outrageous adventures of love, thought and action seems as likely as anything else, and far more tempting than 50 years of sulking, pointing fingers and feeling like the path you are on is the wrong one. Coming face to face recently with the disappointments of a few older people I love, the only gift seems to be laughter. I don’t mind madness, or disappointment, if there’s laughter. If you try and you fail, laugh as you learn and try again. Pg.
What I mean is, my father and I might really be friends, and until then we will try, and love really hard, and laugh. Same with my grandparents, and my uncle. Pg.
The wise people in my life defer to time. Time brings you an amazing job, or the type of heartbreak that fundamentally changes what you want out of life, or another year, or a glimpse of heaven. Perhaps peace is the acceptance of time, the release of attachment to owning and controlling time. I am flowing, it only overwhelms me when I think about it.
Speaking of time, I am running late to a meeting. Maybe today I’ll make it home. I’ve got a smile on my face either way.