a weirder, more interesting life

in the face of pressure to conform, i tend to get weirder. it feels, sometimes, like my/our evolutionary imperative. if something is considered normal, it has already been achieved. in a video game it is rarely satisfying to play the unlocked levels over and over – i want to keep finding the hidden treasures and the next mystery. in life it does not appeal to me to spend all my time in the realm of unlocked levels.

today is the beginning of the 20th annual allied media conference and this instinct in me to get weirder under pressure is part of what led me to this beautiful place. we are in a lineage of people who created more possibility by pushing outside of the norms of their time.

antiblackness, antisemitism, slavery, burning witches, stealing yourself a wife, wife as domestic servant, sex purely for procreation, necessary guns – some very stupid untrue things get normalized as humans work to consolidate power.

i am in the lineage of people who said: i am equal, i am human, i am in love with blackness, i am queer, i am free, i am fucking, i am going to resolve my issues through communication, i am magic. i am fat and wearing a crop top and i look like ice cream from a musical truck on a hot day. i am hairy. i made my head hair into a shaved up pompadour and dyed it Prince-purple. i respect myself as i am. i am smart and not hiding it. i am multitudes and have many love experiments to attend to with this life and body.

and so on.

in this political moment when we have a crisis on every burner, we are letting the rotten ways burn themselves out, creating new recipes, finding new sources of nourishment.

in the onslaught of hate, we root our work in critical connections that require only our continued willingness to grow and to love.

in the face of regressive political forces, we are asserting the radical personal and collective lines on which we will not be turned. and many of us are getting weirder as we recognize we don’t want to belong to a norm world that can’t see or hold us. we want to join a greater vaster stranger world, and create pathways for future generations to follow and surpass.

it looks like a sea of sweet mermaids, unicorns, centaurs, aliens and rebels flowing towards each other. it is multiracial and the center is ever shifting based on who needs the love and care in the moment. it has been shaped by our wildest longings and it will be shaped by more minds and bodies and risks and love stories than i can even imagine.

the weird is so much more interesting than the rote, the same same, the right, the already done. the weird choose freedom. the weird show us the way to get free.

i am about to hug thousands of weirdos and it is better than any corporate holiday. let the AMC2018 (the 20th anniversary!!), begin!

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