big true things

i just got to spend a few hours with my dad buying shoes. he needs running shoes and has had trouble finding 12D size running shoes in japan. then he gave me the talk in which he is concerned i am working too hard and not taking care of my health. my dad loves me. after years of me guaranteeing he’d have a man to meet the next time he visited, he finally got to meet the great billy wimsatt! that was funny. billy was dripping from the non-stop insanity-inducing rain, and my dad was in sock feet talking about his heelspur. very special moment 🙂

its in fact the last day of my fast. 7 days on liquids is a fascinating journey. last night i had the big true things moment. that’s the moment where you start laughing and crying because you are hungry and tired and very deep in your head and a lot of big true things coccur to you about yourself and those you love. so some friends woke up today with big, true emails. i woke up and meditated. i’ve made it up to 6 minutes.

i pray all the time, but actually just sitting still and breathing in and out and meditating is hard for me, so i have decided to start small and aim high. but not get high to get home. and so on.

among the big or true thoughts:

lemons and melons are such close words. maybe not big, but true.

i’ll never love again. maybe not true, but big.

i felt leonard’s presence these past 7 days, impossibly, which has forced me to think further about my own beliefs of what is possible in the spiritual realm.

4:45am in the morning i am off to the bay – the vacation part of my trip will mostly happen on  jetblue, which is hands down my favorite airline. and then straight to the bioneers conference and then some time with ruckus folks in oakland, hoping to see the great daniel alarcon, the mystical hobbes, ben and van at ella baker, and a reunion with my twinstar naina khanna. then to l.a. for training at the feet of the brilliant bernard dory and the brains of allert (they were key players in the success of l.a.’s new mayor), and then hopefully back to ny for a minute before heading down to new orleans, which i have been drawn to like a brokenhearted moth.

now, my dad has never seen goonies, so my mission is clear! peace