that glow

when you got that glow, you know, you know
– the last dragon

all day today people have been telling me i am glowing. i know it. i got some amazing news today that a new life is coming to a loved one.

and i am glowing because i am in a packing process, moving into the home of my dreams. i am clearing out of this little cave/studio apartment which, like the cave/studios that came before it, has been a holding place. the new place isn’t so big, but its brilliant.

and…i am a mover. i grew up moving every two years, and i find the process of organizing things into trash, donations, and things i must keep cathartic. the easiest stuff to give up is clothing and shoes, the hardest is books and cassette tapes – even though i have no cassette player now, i can’t let go of The Jets, that first Bob Dylan mixtape, all the tapes of me singing audio recordings of original songs which i am sure would be painful to hear but…still.

i am glowing because two weeks of time with family and very old friends has me feeling seen in a way that honors how i have grown, and who i have always been.

i have been working a lot lately on saying what i feel, and actually letting myself feel what i feel, sitting in vulnerable moments, doing the best i can at all times.

and, letting go of what i can’t change.

and, coming from the place of radical love as much as i can. love shows me when and where to say yes and no. easily. there is so so much that simply isn’t important, and doesn’t matter…keeping up appearances isn’t why i was given the gift of breath.

i am an earth sign, but lately i keep thinking of how water would move through a moment.

i have come across a lot of things that are amazing as i am packing. these things i want to gift to you:

watch the last dragon,
the fifth element, robin hood

the prophet, khalil gibran
the eight, katherine neville
mastery of love, don miguel ruiz
the art of war, sun tzu
skinny legs and all, tom robbins
the years of rice and salt, kim stanley robinson
and most books by don delillo, joan didion, samuel r delany, philip dick, william gibson, octavia butler, alice walker
autobiographies of malcolm x, grace lee boggs, assata shakur, audre lourde, daniel alarcon, junot diaz

more to come.