feeling better

so feeling better is a process, right?

my process includes, but is not limited to:

– sleeping. i am engaging in a mobile hibernation practiced on planes, in guest rooms, in hotel rooms, and hopefully (soon) home.

– reading about and chatting with folks in copenhagen. i can feel the way history is unfolding there…the mix of need and disgust, hope and hopelessness, strategy and chaos. supporting from afar is it’s own breathlessness.

– getting my eyebrows done. if i don’t feel awake, i can still look awake. before her ‘black/hapa-face’ debacle, tyra banks was most exciting to me in her chronicle of smiles. when my eyebrows are done, it’s like i am smiling with my eyes at all times.

– amazing undergarments. i hope this is relevant to all my readers. knowing that your panties are fantastic/gorgeous and your bra is uplifting is like walking around with a secret weapon. my body was poked, prodded, pumped, pricked, and is bruised, battered, bone-tired. but can still work it? yes, i can.

– saying no. and meaning it. i am figuring out everything that isn’t essential, and saying no to it, because whatever the mysterious ailment was this past weekend, i ended up in a hospital bed pumped full of antibiotics and narcotics, powerless to do my work. watching the work move on without me was frustrating, and then suddenly a major relief. my thinking is, i can make that happen in my life in a less shocking, painful, exhausting way.

– feeling what health is like, how it looks on me.

– occasionally loosing a flurry of curse words at one of the following experiences: my to-do list, my inbox, my frustration at how foggy i still am, and so on. for a doggedly positive person, this feels sooo good.

– great financial news. today was full of lots of great financial news that means the end of the year is going to be ok, even though i missed days of mobilizing it.

– making a date with myself to rest. vacation starts december 20, with family and minimal conference calls, emails, and meetings.

and music.

i can’t stop listening to joanna newsom, sade’s new single, res’s free new album, or this singer named lissie i overheard in a restaurant in brooklyn last week – listen to wedding bells.