in the dark (for oscar and chelsea)

i can feel the scar tissue in the dark
in the dark i hear everything
even my own hunger
now everyone says the dark is coming
so it is time to dream

in order to read the news
i watch videos of tsunamis
i learn how to survive quicksand
i don’t look at the naked emperor
not even to ridicule, it isn’t funny

in my right hand i hold disbelief
in my left, prescience
i didn’t know how it would feel
maybe i never truly considered it
no matter what anyone said

but the gates are coming down now
between reality and assumption
between complacency and commitment
and today, you could be chelsea
today, you too, could be oscar

you could refuse to participate
you could pull back the curtain
you could fight for the land
you could remember yourself
you could outlive this

we will refuse to participate
we will pull back the curtain
we will fight for the land
we will remember who we are
we will outlive this


obama farewell, in parts

obama farewell, in parts:

darkside me: i want him to incite rebellions, he is going for super shady.

eeyore me: but what do you say when democracy requires a peaceful transition to an r-kelly costar?

yoda me: listen you must. strategic he is. coherent sentences you may not hear again from this office.

this is the read me: he’s basically reading the fuck out of mump.

organizer me: much respect to people protesting right now #pardonusall

lucious from empire me: he got it all figured out and no one sees it. he gonna let dude play himself out, just watch.

zen me: there are no borders, there is no separation. everything is right.

beyoncé me: flump breaking all these rules, obama should just stay president.

neil degrasse tyson me: science and reason Do matter.

prince me: when you play the future you play yourself.

mariah carey me: shit happens.

post-nationalist, post-imperialist me: we are on the death star. the leadership doesn’t change the function.

abolitionist bae me: did he free the political prisoners yet?

black great/grand/daughter me: hush. listen – i can still feel a lineage of pride flowing through me.

clingy me: plus he said final point which reminded me what’s coming (sad face).

detroit voter me: and now he’s like y’all need to vote – that hurts more cuz i’m disenfranchised!

neal degrasse tyson me: wait was that bill nye the science guy?

american citizen me: i do wish it felt like this country he speaks of.

boggs-reader me: you have to love america enough to change it.

james baldwin me: i have said it before, but: I love America more than any other country in the world, and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.

darkside me: he has come for scump on every single frontline – the force of shade is an art with this one.

organizer me: he told people to organize. (clap clap clap)

beyoncé me: that look he gives michelle. i can’t.

darkside me: hear that shade of melonino?

zen me: you know nothing, relinquish attachment to this experiment.

fearful me: live live live

astrologer me: and just love. the whole mess. right now this love is the force most required in the universe. love directly and without shame. him and each other, there is enough.

me me: but (broken heart).

auntie me: glad he mentioned how malia and sasha nibblings have grown up so beautifully.

beyoncé me: see he is also most proud of parenting. just sayin.

scarface me: biden’s a tough dude.

me me: he looks heartbroken. they all have break-up-but-still-soulmates faces.

eeyore me: where is sasha?

cool teenager me: malia is counting down in her head.

this is the read me: everything after this is basically trash. basura.

zen me: its always what we make of it.

me me: love hurts. exhale.

from the big city, a summer tease

coming to you live from nyc…i have spent several days with my family, which is always a blessing, though never easy. it takes work to love people and be loved, staying present to people as they are, and not tucking parts of yourself away to stay loved by them.

my nephew could already get a nobel peace prize for the way he has impacted our family dynamic. what is important has shifted (again), and our desire to see him feels like more of a universal truth than any of our differences. i want to run away with him to a land where our only decision is what game to play, and what to learn. i regularly remember all the dreams i had of him before he came, and i wish i could videotape every moment with him and loop it constantly; i want my memory back for this person.

in other news, i had a good long talk with my sister and brother-in-law the other night, and as we drifted around content including irish history, carl sagan, organizing and life, i said “we can reconcile ourselves to a whole new truth if we have enough curiosity…we once thought the earth was flat.” we all thought it was a noteworthy thing to say, made possible by the collective brilliance of the conversation.

in local detroit news, i’ve been really thinking about colonization lately, and how we could begin a new practice. what would it mean to not be colonized, and to not be colonizing? what would it mean to look at detroit and see everything that is growing and building there – not see empty space to be bought, sold, stolen and traded. where i now live, i am humbled by how useless my privilege is in the long run. i was mostly taught to talk and think [and i vacillate between being skilled and clumsy in those regards], but not how to do – how to grow, build, survive. i am finally learning some things that only time and need can teach you. and in the coming battle against the mayor’s plan to colonize segments of detroit for financial gain, which will destroy longstanding communities, the most valuable quality any organizer will have is actually their time spent living in detroit – because what is happening now has happened before. so many times.

the past few days have been balmy-to-hot on the east coast, and i stripped down and pretended i lived in different places, with different, lighter burdens. i am so aware now of time spent not working. it is joyous and necessary to any life balance. warm weather increases my capacity to not work…this tease of summer has uplifted my spirit, and i may just make it to real summer without pause.

** unexpected political commentary**

the healthcare reform bill just passed. its late at night, but it’s a major moment for obama and his supporters. i, personally, am not in a phase where i can be very excited about uber-compromised reforms. trying to watch the process, track the votes and the silly small-minded petty bullshit behavior literally disgusts me – our transformative politic is supposed to include a body of folks who will make 200 amendments on a bill and still not a one of them vote for it? where are the representatives of poor people in their districts? that said, i really like that pre-existing conditions and lifetime limitation restrictions are gone. that will have real life impacts on myself and people i love. its mundane and ugly, but “this is what change looks like…” obama came out to tell us the bedtime story, and for tonight, i will let that rock me to sleep.